It’s Your Fault I’m Fat

Let’s face it, the whole “blame game” has become rather old. Yet, people continue it and even conjure up even more clever excuses as to why they gained weight. Now, this does not include those with health issues or disabilities that limit them to exercise–it is actually not their fault; I am speaking of those who willingly make poor food choices or elude exercise. Many people, mainly celebrities, blame it on pregnancy, their fitness instructors, their stylists…one celebrity even blamed God! Ha! Go figure…although I have to give her credit for that–it was clever. Yes, God forced her to shovel those extra calories into her pretty little mouth, just as my son forced me to eat a lot of Mexican food and Doritos most of my pregnancy (those were my choices). I, personally, do not see a problem with heavyweight people. Beauty is only skin deep and should not be determined on how one’s face is formed or whether he/she is muscular or wears a size 2.

What irks me is the fact people do not want to accept the fact that the weight gain is their fault and their fault alone. Sometimes, even spouses are blamed. My hubby playfully accuses me of his access weight gain. “Honey, it’s your fault because of all the good cooking. I used to fit into a size 32 before we met.” My response: “Well, then, stop eating.” LOL!

I have seen several lawsuits against fast food chains, one in which was successful. I was shocked! No one forced him to consume hamburgers and fries on a daily basis. Unless they secretly tied him up, pried open his mouth and force fed him greasy burgers and overly salted fries, meanwhile telling him that if he doesn’t eat it, he will surely die, he has no ground to stand on. And the lawsuits continue. So, in light of all the ridiculousness, I decided to compose a list of possible lawsuits, just for fun.

1. Hersheys and Tollhouse. Cause: temporary acne and weight gain due to the deliciousness they contain.

2. The companies I purchase my high heels from for making my feet sore by the end of the day and occasionally causing blisters upon purchasing new pairs.

3. Pinterest. For being mildly entertaining, thus consuming my time when I “could” be doing something more productive.

4. General Electric. For occasional fingertip burns when pulling something from a hot oven. Reason: Momentarily slight pain and suffering.

5. Icecream companies. Cause: headaches attributed to ingestion or inhalation of a cold stimulus.

6. Better Homes and Garden among my other magazines. Reason: Occasional paper-cuts due to slick edges of pages.

7. Disney. For creating magical, child-captivating movies and incorporating catchy songs that my children continuously sing and/or watch repeatedly, thus resulting in loss of sanity to parent or caregiver.

Hmm, think I stand a chance?

MJ

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