Friday Funnies

My day thus far:

Jonah still grunts since this is a new and amazing sound to him. All day long, grunting. Did I give birth to a dinosaur?

He also has decided that my nose is a good place to put his fingers in, and a majority of day he has been, desperately, trying to yank my tablecloth off of the dining table. I know it’s going to happen someday, I just know it.

We are in the Family Dollar:

Me: No, don’t touch that.
No, stop that.
Jonah: Yeah.
Me: No, I said “don’t touch.” He smiles at me. While I am talking to Steven, he reaches for a package of cookies on a shelf and, of course, it happened to be the package nearest the bottom. Why not, right? Luckily, I caught him before he pulled it out, sending the entire pile tumbling to the floor. Phew.

We are now in Food City. He reaches behind him and tries to grasp for the items in the cart. Of course, his first choice are the eggs. Because, last month, he reached the stage of needing to touch EVERYTHING he sees. And, I mean EVERYTHING! He even tried to nibble on one of the puppies. LOL Sigh.

We are now home. He enjoys his walker and, since he has mastered maneuvering it in only one day (yes, only my kid), this Mommy is constantly on her toes. So, he is in the dining room, I can see him while I am cooking. He starts backing up his walker like he is backing up a vehicle, with one arm on the back seat while looking behind him. He backs into my house plant. The beautiful flowering house plant I have had for over two years, and begins to strip it’s leaves off the stems. I move the house plant into the kitchen and swerve him in another direction. Not two minutes later, I turn around and he is in the garbage! He has a dirty napkin in each hand. I snatch them both and he starts screaming bloody murder…it’s gets even louder when I get a baby wipe to clean his hands. Shame on this Mommy for attacking those germs!

So, now we need to get a taller trash can. Just because it has a lid, does not mean he won’t get in it. And, it is time to put up more baby gates around the house. I thought I had another month or two. I. was. wrong.

By the time my son is one, he is going to believe his name is, “Nodon’ttouchthat.

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